Monday 17 February 2014

Wattle I do? - They brought back Birds of a Feather, but they won't bring back Blake's 7

This is where I lament the non-return of a classic sci-fi/ fantasy series while staring in horror at the filth that is re-gurgling forth from the sewage pipe of effluent TV.

This week I need to declare thus "They brought back Birds of a Feather but they won't bring back Blake's 7!" What the hell! BOAF died in 1998 but has been reanimated using darkest magic.  Why have you brought this back? It's maggot infested carcass should have been left to rot back into the earth.  But no this moaning sad sack of crap roams the corridors once again.  The stories are lifeless and depressing, the fat one lives alone and looks like an old boy who has long given up on trying to be a woman. The blond ones face is falling into the sea.  Dorian looks like a very old prostitute who would only be hired by those who have lived more than a hundred years, or people involved in a satanist ritual.  The characters do not evolve they are in perpetual stagnation.  Return to the foulest pits of festering excrement I command thee!  Blake's 7 had a constantly shifting ensemble cast.  The characters evolved.  Blake was idealistic, Avon was cynical.  In the beginning their personalities clashed.  Over time they developed a mutual respect.  The universe was a complex place, there were lots of people to kill or befriend or both.  They have tried a few time to bring back Blake's 7 and failed.  Try harder!  I know sci-fi can cost more, so use the money from 3 rubbish programmes like BOAF!

If you would like me to discuss any more TV injustice then add your comments below.

Thanks for reading!

4 comments:

  1. i like reading your sci fi knowledge, i have none
    i start to see why it is so worthwhile watching
    i think the blonde bird looks like Rick Parfitt
    and Dorian looks like Francis Rossi
    if you dont believe me this is them 10 years from now in a care home http://i1.mirror.co.uk/incoming/article1418437.ece/ALTERNATES/s615/Rick%20Parfitt%20and%20Francis%20Rossi-1418437
    i think Sharon just carries the guitars or makes the tea or lives in some doss house bemoaning the days when she was famous, like Alan Lancaster the slightly scary bass player, who, by the way, Status Quo appear to have tried to eradicate from all history ever
    i understand Alan Lancaster's pain
    perhaps you could represent the injustice of Tosh from the Bill with the constant rejuvenation of Dr Who
    thanks

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    1. Hi Tony, glad to hear that you may convert to sci-fi, it's a very rewarding lifestyle I promise! What sci-fi does is show us how great we can be, it can be aspirational. It's also cautionery which I think is a good thing. Good sci-fi/fantasy has great writers which are usually leagues beyond any other type of TV. These guys are generally hugely creative, philosophical & witty. They also credit the viewer with intelligence which is most rare. Youu are so right about the blond one looking like Rick Parfitt, I looked at the link, the resemblance is uncanny. poor old Tosh, it breaks my heart.

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  2. Did BOAF have a laughter track? I bet it did. Re-release "I'm Alan Partridge" without the canned laughter.

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    1. Hi Jymmy, BOAF most certainly does have a laughter track, how would the idiot public know when to laugh. I watched it the other day and there was spontaneous laughter when someone was simply walking to a shop - what?! Yes I really agree about IAP, there is no need for a laughter track. The absence of a LT would reveal how edgy the comedy really was.

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